Spring is Around the Bend!

Although it does not seem like it, We're already in Spring of 2010. I have been 27 for three months now and I have got to say with the exception of a few pitfalls, the year is going amazing. My work life seems to finally be coming together and I'm feeling happy about the choice of switching from one subject to another and I am lucky because I still get to teach English (middle school, which isn't what I hoped but it's better than nothing.).
The only thing that upsets me is that I started teaching last year and I really truly have found a great friend a colleague, Elaine Palladino. She's genuine, kind, no-nonsense and I have learned a lot from her since I started working with her last year. What's best is that our relationship transcended from work to personal and I adore her. This year started off a bit differently, as opposed to last year, Elaine found her calling, if you will. She's begun a very small but awe-inspiring photography business. She is doing amazing for herself (as I knew she would) and I am so proud and happy for her I can't stand it. I see her blog and her pictorial posts and I mean she's gifted, it's new for her and she's searching for her niche but it's like a chrysalis becoming a butterfly slow and beautiful. When she gets it she really gets it right. At the same time, I am so, so sad. I know that her business is going to take off- talent like that doesn't get to be hidden for long and I know she may have felt a bit dissilusioned with teaching this year (she's amazing at that too by the by) and when it does and she leaves me, I'm. Going. To. Be. A. Wreck. I mean I know other people here at school, but no one like her, and no one as close as I am to her. I'm going to feel lost and overwhelmed. Funny though, she inspired me too. Since she went off to hone her photog skills, I decided to look within and see what I'm interested in doing, and like all people who don't live under rocks, I want to do so much! However, I am distinctly interested in baking. I want to perhaps Martha Stewart my way into the world of Baking and Pastries. However, I've put it on the shelf because A) I am dead broke and B) I am truly focused on losing weight this year - more on that later.

I'm truly grateful for the opportunity this summer of going to Europe for the first time ever. Nothing can stop me, I mean I'm going to have to die in order for this trip to be cancelled. I can't be the French teacher who's never been to France. I can't wait. I'm flying out June 15. I. Am. Elated! Hopefully the trip will have all the cliches that occur in film. I mean like discovering and learning new things about myself, perhaps falling in love- not necessarily with a man but maybe with a custom, a food, a palace or a landscape. My friends think I'm crazy for going alone but hey, I've made my decision and what's done is done. Am I scared? I'd be lying if I said I wasn't not only because I'm notoriously known as a GIANT Scaredy cat but because it's scary. Another continent- ALONE.

But Elaine leaving and myself travelling have two things in common if it doesn't kill me, it has got to make me stronger. I'm positive that I will grieve Elaine leaving for her destiny and I'll try and back out of going to Europe for sheer terror, but it will happen and I will go and I will come out the other side a better person for having the experiences.

Alright, weight loss. I know you read that blog where I said I wasn't kidding and it was on like Donkey Kong... truth be told- NIL was done. I know. FAIL of the century. But here's where I redeem myself. February 1st of 2010 I began a real honest to goodness life-altering "diet." It's in quotes because I'm not dieting in the original sense of attempting to lose weight. That's one side effect but my goals are simple- get fit where I feel comfortable in my skin, and two... my dad said if I reached a specific weight he'd quit smoking... Well, I'm pretty certain that weight is negotiable and I'm looking forward to seeing him squirm. I must say I feel ashamed still of how much I weighed at my fattest, and I don't feel I've lost enough weight yet to mention where I am at or where I need to be. Lot's of organic food, cutting out junk, soda, etc. However- not denying myself either. I have "cheat days" where I forgive myself and splurge on something. I have to say it's the first time I feel no pressure whatsoever, and I'm even sort of into the working out thing, which is the toughest. Do I wish I saw overnight results, yes. So since I'm desperate to weigh myself every two minutes (and don't) I have adopted this motto, "SLOW AND STEADY WINS THE RACE." I am the tortoise and I am taking this day by day and patiently. I have to say I have a LOT of support. I don't tell everyone I come in contact with about it but those who do know are awesome to me. Even some people who don't know tell me they see a difference which feels awesome! There's nothing like the high of stepping on the scale and seeing you've lost 6lbs. as evident by my 6AM texts to my supporters! Elaine included!

As a direct result of this, I have also put on a shelf (literally) my aspirations of becoming world renouned baker extraordinare! I know that I am really interested in the industry and I know it's super hard work but the pay off is pretty awesome. I don't have the money to join cullinary school and unlike Elaine and her free-lance photography learn-as-you-go approach (which works for her because she's already so talented) I need to go to cullinary school because I suck at math and although I can bake a cake that serves four to ten people I can't convert the same recipe to serve 40- 50 people. I hate math. But I love cookbooks. I aspire to open my own confectionary one day. Like the one on Main Street in Disney.

Speaking of Disney, I'm going to drive up tonight literally on a wing and a prayer. I have no money but I'm driving up to visit my friends and play in the park. I have not been since the summer and I so love the DISNEY experience. First, I love the drive up. I usually drive up alone. I enjoy the time to rock out to my music, or talk to myself (Philosophically, of course, not as a psycho). I love getting there and getting updated on all the Disney people goings-on. Then I love going out and having fun. Lastly, I love going to the parks. My goodness I can't conceive how people say they tire of the parks! I worked there, I lived and breathed those parks top to bottom, good and bad (and there was BAD) but I adore it. I love the feeling of waiting in the queue rocking to Aerosmith waiting to ride their Rockin' Roller Coaster or although I never ride it because it scares the ever-living out of me the great queue of Hollywood Tower of Terror. It's genius!
I'm so looking forward to it. Also, I'm stepping out to EPCOT to enjoy my "cheating" with some French Patisseries!

Anyway, these are just some of the random thoughts rolling around in my brain currently. I guess you could say I was doing some mental Spring cleaning.

Love.